August 17, 1999

Praise the Lord and remember His benefits!

Dearest Family and Friends,

   Just let me warn you ahead of time that this will be an update letter like you've never received from us before. My last chemo treatment was June 22nd. My catheter will be removed on Wednesday morning, August 18th. Having said that, let's go back and tell you what in the world has been going on for the past several weeks. Towards the middle of June, my doctor (who is a Christian) here in Ponca City received the radiologist's report from the only CT scan I’ve had done here. He read it as normal. I just looked at him and said "what's normal to you and normal to me may not be the same!" My doctor told me that he would go look at the films himself and compare them with all the other CT scans that I had done in Lubbock. So, the radiologist that read it as normal and my doctor had a big pow-wow with my 'guts' displayed all over the x-ray boards. When that was over, my doctor told me that doing all that raised more questions with him than answers. We went back over my history, the surgery, the malignancy, the 'clear' ultrasound on my liver before I started chemo, my blood work, etc. He told me that any number of things could cause your liver enzymes to go wacky as well as your blood work to not quite be in the normal ranges. My history also included my first oncologist telling me after my 'clear' ultrasound that my liver was fine.

   ANYWAY, my doctor said he wanted to talk with my doctor in Lubbock and he did and he still wasn't convinced that there is cancer in my liver. I then very daintily said, "WHAT DO WE DO NOW?!?" He suggested that I continue on chemo until my next CT scan at the last of September. I asked him if there was indeed cancer in my liver, would it grow tremendously if I got off of chemo right then. He said no. Gary and I prayed about it that night and then again that next morning before I was to start my next round of chemo on July 20th. We spoke with the doctor before the nurses could hook me up the next morning and said, "we want off". He said he completely understood. He only asked that I still come in for my regular blood work for a while and still have my next CT scan at the last of September. Those of you that know me very well, know that if it hadn't been for the doubts of my doctor here, I would have stayed on chemo like a good little girl until the Lord took me home.

   We don’t know if I’m still terminal. We don't know if my decision has just filled out my death certificate for the not too distant future. I don’t have a clue what’s going to happen to me, but l know Who’s holding me. I’m singing praises to Him for relieving my suffering and for giving me a husband that has and will continue to stand behind me and love me no matter what we come up against. Gary is singing praises to Him for giving him back his wife. The reason that I'm having my catheter removed is one..... faith. I'm praying for a good CT scan, of course. But if it shows growth (which will indicate that it is indeed cancer), I've decided I'm going to enjoy the rest of this earthly life with quality. Now we're asking: What does He want us to do? How can we best serve Him? After all, He allowed the suffering in the last 2 1/2 years of our lives. He's not a cruel God. He doesn't play tricks. He loves us more than our own earthly parents could ever begin to. I know there's a plan, if only to prove to you all, that if we believe and give our lives to Him, He will never leave us or forsake us. He'll be with us every second, every minute, every hour of our days.

   I started working full-time for a CPA husband-wife team on July 26th and I just love it! (hope they do too) I help them with their client's monthly bookkeeping and financial statements. I'm learning a lot and stretching my gray matter. ouch Gary is doing great in his job and just started working days today! He’s been on nights for a while and l missed him so much. Gretchen our doggie-daughter is loving her new backyard and sliding on the wood floors. (okay, we throw the ball to make her slide... ) We sent out our new email address last time, so if you have an email, send us one so we can put you in our address book! Our prayers are with you all and we'd appreciate a couple of special ones from you for us..... 1) a good CT scan in September and 2) that God would bring a buyer soon for our RV. Keep in touch!

Lots of love,

Gary & Jo

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